LIKE any other activity, riding a motorcycle has garnered its own sub-culture of fashion and apparel, whether it’s technical riding wear, or casual clothing and accessories. If it can be sold, bike-related brands will stick a logo on it and send this out the door.
And like any other exercise, golf, football, there are some items of clothing plus kit that really are no-go areas in the eyes of the many. In this article, we take a look back at some of the most heinous motorbike fashion fake pas ever commited.
Top worst motorcycle fashion does not work out
10. Knock-off race replica jackets
You see them at the BSB , bike events , autojumbles and motorbike shows . You can spot them a mile off as they feature shoddy badges, the ‘Repsol’ font is never quite right, and the leather looks about as tough as an MP’s backbone. They are usually, of course , shoddily made ‘replica’ race leathers. Whether they are one-piece or two, they will likely provide you all the protection of a leaky condom and are a surefire way of getting a string of people sniggering in your once you’re out of earshot.
Yes, they are usually cheaper than the alternative. Granted, you might have been drunk when clicked the ‘Buy it now’ button, but that will be why on the eighth day our lord and saviour Jeff Bezos created the particular 14-day cooling off period. 14 days was chosen while this is usually the maximum amount of time it takes any human to realise these are complete pish.
Save your money, and get some proper leathers from RST .
9. ‘Built Not Bought’ stickers on lightly ‘customised’ bikes
This was rife a few years back and you still see it now. This sticker is definitely most likely to be found upon a ritter of the bike. More often compared to not it’ll be painted at home, using three cans associated with unmatched matt black spray paint, and someone will have hacksawed the silencer off – bonus points if they have needlessly used heat wrap around the exhaust (see point 5).
The bike will be something like a 15-year-old Hyosung 125cc cruiser, with a cloned CG125 engine. The rider will be wearing a fashion leather jacket (the eagle motif within the back is slightly skewwhiff), camo jeans with the wallet chain. On their bonce will be a Nitro helmet with tribal art onto it that looks like these people kick this down the stairs daily.
Worn proudly on the air filter cover would have been a ‘Built Not Bought’ sticker, with a spanner breaking up the top and bottom lines. Creeping out the back of the same air filter cover will become a bunch of wires that have been joined with household terminal connectors, as well as the chain will be so worn it is nearly dragging on the ground.
That’s right, you’re a bike builder now buddy…
8. Jeans tucked into boots
Denim jeans tucked in to boots, why? It has no advantage whatsoever on the particular bike, if anything, it makes life worse. Indeed, we all know that will some motorcycle leathers tuck into the boots, yet there are reasons for this, namely, added protection. But when you are wearing your freshest Primark specials plus out for the Sunday ‘blast’, there really is no need.
Nobody needs to see your own flashy plastic or carbon shin guards because guess what; nobody actually cares.
7. Mismatched leathers and bike
I once saw a guy riding along Mablethorpe high-street on a full Valentino Rossi (2010 Fiat-era) Yamaha YZF-R6. In fairness, the paint for the bike was quite good, and possibly a Dream Machine job. The problem was his leathers were an exact replica of Marc Marquez’ and he even had an MM93 lid on like some mismatched cherry on a very confused cake.
I suppose in football terms it’s like those 50/50 duplicate football shirts you can get, with both of the teams playing that day featured on one shirt, split over the middle. They are seen as the lowest of the low in football circles. This particular motorcycle faux pas is looked on in very much the particular same way.
6. Anodised stubby levers/rearsets
I have a mate who will be a bike breaker plus a general motorcycle hoarder who can’t bring himself to throw anything away. Even bent, or slightly pranged bicycle parts can find a place in his (eBay) shop window, and inevitably everything eventually finds the home. There is one item though that gets whipped off in addition to binned as soon as a bike lands in the workshop, any cheap, nasty, anodised tat.
And I’m with him on this one, because, what’s typically the point? And before We get every aftermarket accessory firm in the UK sending me nasty emails; pipe down, I’m not talking about you lot. I’m talking about this crap you can buy off AliExpress, Wish. com, and pretty much every other dodgy website out there. Yes, your bike might be a whole seven grams lighter than stock thanks to you fitting your new ‘Superfast Best Brake Lever Number 1 ™’ flick-up adjustable jobbies. But you’ll 100% look like more associated with a bellend when that will chocolate box alloy snaps halfway through a 300-mile ride, and have to get home with no front brake.
5. Exhaust wrap when there really is no need
This has become more prevalent as café racer culture boomed, but fitting exhaust wrap to a new bike of which doesn’t need it is a bit like wearing a jodhpurs and a horse riding helmet whenever you’re doing your weekly shop.
On the right cycle, exhaust wrap has some sort of practical purpose. It can stop you from getting burns on your leg if the exhaust routing is usually tight, and even can prevent heat from the exhaust through damaging often the fairing, or transferring to the bike’s mechanical parts. The thing is, on your own otherwise stock Triumph Thruxton, there is no fairing, you’re Chicken legs aren’t in danger, together with a clever person in the factory already designed your bike so the heat from your exhaust doesn’t have a detrimental effect on the exact engine.
Not only the fact that, but glass fibre wrap can also murder a bike’s exhaust system if you are not careful. Water soaks the wrapping, which then sits in the pipe degrading the metal. There is definitely also a good chain regarding thought that the particular insulation that the cover provides is enough to cause the metallic to fatigue and crack, as typically the heat can not escape quickly enough.
4. ‘Polite’ vests
Okay, I am going to hunker down behind my laptop now, as we posted about this particular on social media not very long ago and caused quite a debate. The ‘POLITE’ (written in a very similar font to ‘POLICE’ and surrounded by chequered banding) vest is one of the most divisive items of motorcycle kit or even clothing. Above all else, it will stir this pot and additionally generate (mostly) entertaining banter between bikers.
On often the one side of the fence is the ‘well it’s not hurting you, can be it? ’ crew. Their argument is that it’s free choice to wear what a person want so leave them to it. Then there is certainly the ‘Oh my god what your knobber, “Hey Kev look at this specific muppet”’ great deal, who just find them some source involving amusement whenever they are spotted. Finally, though, we have your ‘up within arms – they must be shot/hung/arrested’ posse, who bang upon about how impersonating a police officer is a crime and they must be punished.
Im not sure where I actually sit on this kind of, but that will doesn’t stop it from making the list. Purely and simply because I will writing this damn thing. I am curious though, if you combine a POLITE vest along with an ex-Police R 1200 RT not to mention white Arai RX7, is normally filtering via London loads easier?
3. Using scrubbed sliders you bought off eBay
Look I’m not really pointing the exact finger, but it happens. I simply did a fabulous search about eBay and also there are any number of used sliders up for sale and it isn’t really like we are talking ex-famous racer jobbies. They are just worn sliders!
The thing of which gets my goat regarding these is without a doubt, they are literally pointless. I actually break it down because follows. You aren’t fooling your mates, they all know how an individual ride, therefore, therefore , they know anyone can’t/won’t/haven’t got your knee down yet. That means the only people you must be out to impress are the particular people out there the fact that you don’t know. Strangers, randoms, individuals you’ll never see again. The silly thing concerning doing that is, nobody actually cares.
2. A two-up couple with totally matching gear
Nothing screams ‘the BMW dealer really saw us coming! ’ like a couple on the tour wearing totally matching motorcycle equipment: Textiles, boots, gloves, as well as lid. The whole shebang.
There aren’t many couples that would walk with regards to on a night out wearing exactly the same clothing. Why would you do it any time you’re away on typically the bike? The particular closest point I can compare this to might be couples that have an important joint Facebook page : as soon as I see those My partner and i start thinking ‘okay, which one of a person cheated? ’.
Furthermore, motorcycle kit is a very personal choice. One brand may make lids that fit an individual like a glove, while others are as uncomfortable as hell and cause an instant migraine. There is a very good chance that one of the folks within the duo is riding along inside kit that is not necessarily as suitable as they would like that to be. Typically the only factor keeping them quiet in the matter is that will it cost an extra £3, 000 on top of this bike and they are too scared to mention the idea.
1. Stick with ears, ponytail, mohawk
The act of sticking furry ears and mohawks on motorbike helmets came about on the tail end of often the last century, and it was funny, for about a week. You could (and still can amazingly) order any number of gaudily coloured accoutrements, from feline ears, flappy dog ear, fox-tails, mohawks and ever afros for your skid cover, and We are sorry if I sound boring but, I just don’t get it.
One connected with the old Visordown editors summed up this type of driving accessory perfectly some years back. He said, ‘Turning up to a rideout wearing these is such as turning up in order to the pub wearing your current girlfriend’s underwear and expecting everyone to find it funny. It’s merely weird. What are you actively playing at? ’
What more can I say?
Editors disclaimer: This particular article has been produced for entertainment purposes only. No actual disrespect is meant (except with regard to numbers 10 and 3 – anyone wronguns). If you have been affected by the issues raised in this article, head off to be able to a quiet place and also have a sit down, you will feel better quickly.