A BBC wildlife documentary.
We are now entering the cafeteria of Bidirectional University. The stench of food and unclean air ducts provide a sharp contrast to the seven pristine Range Rovers we saw parked at the entrance.
Upon arrival, you’ll find the average heavily depressed, slightly deluded, and severely narcissistic university students in their natural habitat. Going further inside, all of us come across the several types of people that lurk in this cafeteria.
The messy eater
Remember the particular ravenous kid who completely demolished that chocolate fudge cake in Matilda? That’s exactly how Iftekhar eats stale cafeteria food during his lunch break leaving no prisoners. The food gets on his teeth, shirt, cafeteria walls, friends, and germaphobes sitting next to him. It’s best to keep extra tissues and hand sanitiser around Iftekhar, as you never know when his antics may ruin your presentation wear.
Couples that should get a room
We get it Mayesha, you and your boyfriend are in love. But please stop sloppily feeding each other fuchka in the middle of a good university cafeteria. Your love is gonna fade, but the trauma you gave to the guy sitting in front of you are going to last a while.
What’s worse is when these couples get into a screaming fight on the cramped benches and the whole Bangla Chayachobi plays out two feet within front associated with you and the food you are trying to eat.
The particular one guy with a guitar
There’s always one man who, around the age of 15, may get a guitar as a gift and decides to make their whole personality revolve close to it. He takes guitar lessons, practices for years, plus spends a good deal of money on equipment. But will be he good at playing the guitar? No, yet does that will stop your pet? Also no .
Rakin thinks he plays like Jimi Hendrix. The people around him disagree.
College clubs aren’t just about the particular ECAs anymore. They’re like family in order to their members.
Clueless first-year students are indoctrinated by Bidirectional University’s premier clubs (read cults) en masse to form a twisted Celebrity Plus or Kardashian-esque family. These families will treat the cafeteria as an extension associated with their mouldy and suffocated club rooms, bickering, roughhousing and doing general nonsense with no regard for people just trying to mind their business. Let’s not forget the personal branding squad who feels the need to wear their own club handouts wherever they go.
Outdated high school clique
Bushra, Anika and Iftekhar all went to the same private English medium school that costs you a good arm, leg and your own sanity. Inspired by teen dramas they binge-watched in order to perfect their particular fake American accents, these people decide to reinvigorate their high school clique. And despite the attention and validation they seek, they vehemently refuse in order to socialise with anyone outside their circle.
You’ll find them in the particular corner of the cafeteria, silently and piercingly scrutinising everything from your outfit to the meals you’re eating. The greatest way in order to interact with this stereotype is usually to not acknowledge all of them at all and leave them to fume in self-inflicted agony.
Taaseen Mohammed Islam can write semi-decently at the expense of being able to do basic math. Send your pet pointers in taaseen. [email protected] com